Being KNOWN is a Blessing from God

It’s been a tough question for me, and maybe for you. “Why can’t you just leave it alone?  Why do you feel the need to tell people about your past?” Well, for the clients in my business, casual acquaintances and 99% of my church – I don’t. But I can’t disagree with the fact that I do feel better when people I love, care about and have a close relationship with understand my WHOLE history. I would hate for them to somehow discover my past later through a 3^rd party and to feel a sense of total dishonesty on my part – as if they didn’t know me at all.

My best friend at church knew (I later learned) there was something “off” about me at church the day before I told her my WHOLE history. She didn’t know it at the time, but I was looking around inside the building that Sunday and just taking it all in because it might have been my last Sunday at that church – and it made sad and just a little weepy.  THAT is someone who knows you and why I wanted her to know my FULL history, because then it all made sense to her. Read more “Being KNOWN is a Blessing from God” →

Why Do I Not Give Personal Details?

The nature of what I do, who I want to reach makes it a little complicated at this point in time.  Primarily because a big part of what I feel called to do is help provide a way for what would be called “conservative evangelical” churches to be able to open up their hearts for Christians who are transgender.  Well – I GO to a church like this and I LOVE it.  My Pastor knows who I am and he knows my heart.  At the same time, he has a large church to shepherd and navigate through these difficult waters.  This is NOT an easy job.  My heart goes out to him.  I’m sure there are many who not knowing me would have an issue with me being a member of the church. Read more “Why Do I Not Give Personal Details?” →

Then God Said, “Let Us Make Lemonade”

Yep, I’m pretty sure He said it. My guess is right after Eve and Adam took that bite from the fruit. If you haven’t read why I believe God Doesn’t Make Mistakes, that might help what I say here make better sense.

God’s perfect plan was that Adam and Eve would stay away from the tree – they didn’t. They invited Sin into the world, and here we are. Because I was born transgender, I never felt I could be a worthy representative for our Lord. I always felt that if I talked to someone about Jesus and somehow they later found out that I was transgender, it would invalidate anything I said. Read more “Then God Said, “Let Us Make Lemonade”” →

Rejected By Your Family? Go Get a New One!

It’s NOT an unusual story to be shunned by your family when you tell them that you are transgender.  The very concept is just so impossible to comprehend that unfortunately, they think you must be wrong and have turned your back on God.  They beg you to pray, they have their Pastor pray for you, NOTHING you say really gets listened to – and when you decide to live out your life as the person you really are they reject you.  They kick you out of the house or perhaps refuse to see you ever again – in my case my parents and brothers have never seen me since I transitioned 25 years ago. Read more “Rejected By Your Family? Go Get a New One!” →

“Testing the Water” at Your Church

If you attend a church that is not (or as far as you can tell) affirming of transgender folks in their midst, Austen Hartke (AKA Austen Lionheart) has posted a great video on various ways of testing the water at your church.  He has several wonderful ideas you can try to get a feel for just how sensitive a subject it is among others at your church, from the very subtle to having THE conversation with your Pastor (something I have some experience with myself).

So go check it out – I recommend you subscribe to his channel so you get notified when a new post is up (once a week.)  He has very good material presented thoughtfully and in a very friendly, non-confrontational manner.  You can’t help but like him.

If You’re Been Badly Hurt by Church, You’re Not…

It’s not a stretch to think that if you’re a Christian who’s transgender, that you’ve been hurt by Christ’s church.  The church can be a place of amazing love and comfort, or a source of horrible pain and suffering – totally contrary to what our Lord wants, but the problem with the church isn’t Jesus, the problem with the church is PEOPLE.  And since that includes you and me, yes, WE are part of the problem.  John Pavlovitz is a pastor and has written a great article about how do you trust the very place that hurt you so badly.  I encourage you to read it…http://goo.gl/Nnzxfd